Corrine the Comforter

Corrine slept through the night, waking every few hours to change positions or rinse her mouth with water. Each time she woke she would ask me "Why is this taking so long?" She's in a hurry to get to heaven.

Then Corrine aswered her own question. "I guess God's still working on me." And then I began to cry, which turned to deep weeping, and she comforted me. It seems so backwards that Corrine, lying broken, is still caring for me. But that's God's grace—He can make good in every situation.

Corrine's pain medicine was increased yesterday. She isn't able to swallow very well and is reluctant to drink because it feels like 'something is stuck in her throat.' She was only able to swallow her pain medication today, so to we are going to use alternatives to control her other symptoms.

Corrine said goodbye to Anna and Camille when they left the house this morning for the day. She told them a story about her dog, Jacque, a toy poodle she had when their daddy Steve was growing up, and how much Jacque meant to her. She handed them each a small, white stuffed poodle and said "That's about how big Jacque was when we brought him home. You can take them home with you, they are yours to keep."

Corrine brought comfort and joy to both girls with that story and simple gift. It's so often the little things that mean so much.

If you want to visit Corrine, please scroll down and read the post labeled "Visitor Guidelines."

Thank you for your continued prayers and support!

-Angela

On Love, Friendship, and Marriage

Corrine is upstairs sleeping peacefully tonight as she has for much of the day. She remains comfortable and is conversant intermittently throughout the day. But in truth her body continues to fail her. You will recall that the cancer started in the esophagus which is located just above the stomach. Today is the first time Corrine has had a hard time swallowing which has obvious implications for eating and drinking.

The good news is that my mother is still very much herself. We had an intimate time with Don tonight as the two of them shared how they met and fell in love some 13 years ago (their anniversary is on January 6th, one day after my mother's 68th birthday). Don did most of the talking but my mother piped in with comments and her typical sense of humor. We all laughed and thoroughly enjoyed one another's company. The time was short, but sweet.

I have been thinking a lot about relationship. Marriage is one many of us know. Friendship is a relationship that I hope all of us know. It is a powerful thing.

A very long time friend of my mother's stopped by today to just sit with her. As it happened my mother woke up. Surprised to see her friend at her side she said "how long have you been there?" Her friend replied something to the effect of "Corrine, I have been here for you always, as long as I can remember." I can vouch for the validity of this statement and was reminded today of the power of friendship.

These snapshots of love, marriage and friendship give me pause to reflect on my own life. I am grateful to have deep relationships with friends an family. But now I am inspired to go deeper yet.

Onward and Upward.

Steve

Visitor Guidelines

Jennifer, the hospice nurse, just facilitated a very good conversation about the transition to heaven that Corrine is experiencing. We have decided, together, that as long as Corrine's pain can remain in control we will continue to care for her at home.

To best support Corrine, we ask that you please call before visiting. This does not lessen our love for you, but grows from our concern for Corrine. Jennifer emphasized that a quiet environment will help her make the transition more peacefully.

If you have visited Corrine recently, we kindly ask that you leave space today for those who have not had a chance to say goodbye.

If you would like to visit, remember to call first. For those visiting, please keep these things in mind:

1. All visits need to be kept short. Plan on spending about 3 minutes with Corrine.
2. When you talk with Corrine, please talk to her... Don't try to draw her into conversation or ask her questions... Her role now is to be a listener.
3. Keep conversations outside of her 'room' in very low voices as sound carries through out the home.

Thank you for helping us love Corrine.

-Angela

In Corrine's Own Words

I have had a very sweet time with my mother this morning. There is no doubt she is tired and fading quickly, but she is at peace. She asked that I share with you what she feels and is thinking about today.

• She wants her friends and family to know that "all is well with her soul"
• She wants you to know that she is "excited to see Jesus, I'm getting closer"
• And she asks that you "please forgive me for anything I've done that has been hurtful to you"

These moments bring life (and death) into focus so sharply and quickly. I think what my mom wants more than anything for us left behind is to experience a little more heaven here on earth. What that means is for us to have right relationship with God and with each other. Relationships are a gift from God that he so wanted us to enjoy and receive that He sent his only son, Jesus, to show us the way and to heal us so that we might know intimacy more fully with God and man. This is His gift to us, that we might be reconciled here on earth and begin to experience a taste of life here as it is in heaven. Right relationship is at the center of the secret to living life eternally, beginning today.

Until next time...

Steve

A Good Day

Corrine had a good day today. She was able to rest well and experienced only minor, intermittent pain. Pearly, her elder sister, was able to spend a good part of the day with Corrine at her bedside. It was a very special time for both of them.

My girls (Anna age 2 and Camille age 4) are doing super. When they are around my mother is the most alert with a great big smile. It is amazing to me how children can light up a room and how willing they are to love regardless of one's circumstances. One of the highlights for Susanna and I was watching Camille read (actually recite by memory) a bedtime story to their grandmother before bed tonight. Very special indeed.

I asked my mother not long ago what advice she might have for those of us she leaves behind. The answer was two fold: First, pursue Jesus and second "simplify". I continue to reflect on these words as we continue down this road.

One last thought before I sign off for the night regarding prayer. Remember how Jesus prayed. "Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven."

Until tomorrow...

Steve

Using e-mail to organize help

Thank you so much to everyone who has offered to help. We really appreciate the support.

On a practical note, organization and communication is very difficult for us. We have different people answering the phone, long distance phone calls, critical calls from Hospice, and distracted minds to contend with.

In order to make our care for Corrine as easy as possible, instead of calling to volunteer to help with any current or future requests, please e-mail Corrinesfamily@gmail.com

New Help Requests

1. A friend of Corrine's from Arvada Covanent Church is helping to organize food for the family. Please e-mail how you would like to help. For example, can you provide an entire meal for _# of people—or would you rather provide a portion of the meal, or, are you flexible? If you do not hear back immediately, don't worry, it's just because Don and Corrine are so popular : )

2. We are also trying to look ahead and find people who would be willing and able to host family or friends from out of town. If you have the space and the inclination, e-mail with the number of people you can comfortably host as well as the general area you live.

3. Transportation may also be needed, so if you have a vehicle and you are a safe driver... no crazy drivers please : ) e-mail us the type of vehicle as well as number of people you can safely transport.

Thank you for your understanding about using this new e-mail address as our primary mode of communication for the help we need.

Corrinesfamily@gmail.com

Continue to use the 'comments' part of the blog to post encouragements. We read them to Corrine as we recieve them.

Thank you for your love, prayer, and support.

-Angela

Welcome 2009

Corrine had a peaceful night with angels standing guard. She experienced her own fireworks show, only this time it was much less frightening for her.

We are going to take today one minute at a time. Likely, Corrine's visitors will need to be limited, both in number and duration. We are going to try to keep upstairs as peaceful for her as possible, but there is space in the basement for conversation and memory swapping, as well as for the grandchildren to play.

I don't know Don's family and friends well, so I can't identify who might be a good support for him. But you know who you are! We (her family) don't want to discourage you from visiting and supporting Don in any way. We love him too and want him cared for in this trying time.

-Angela

Good night 2009!

Thank you to everyone who helped today; we have felt the support. Food, omputer help, visits, cards, and comments from the blog have all been very encouraging.

Corrine was surprised this afternoon with the visit of her older sister Pearly and her husband, Wayne. We heard about Corrine as a six year old wearing a beautiful blue dress her sister pressed for her and dancing around with a camisole. So I guess she has always been a vivacious girl! After hearing that story, Corrine told me she was looking forward to dancing in heaven because she's always had two left feet.

Corrine also had several other adoring fans come visit her. Susanna, Steve's wife, and two loving girls, Camille and Anna. They brought with them a load of energy as they climbed onto the bed to give hugs. Corrine's face lit up with joy as she expressed her love for them.

Corrine was able to take her evening medications and the nausea is under control for the time being, but breathing is beginning to slow and become less rhythmic. The pain has continued to be in control for the time being.

We know there is a crowd of angels waiting for Corrine and watching over us. Corrine wanted me to express her love to all of you and to tell you above all that "God is Good! And He loves you very much!"

Talk to you next year,
Angela

Something you can do

Please feel free to post notes to Corrine using the blog. We can easily read these to her when she has energy. I'm sure she will find encouragement in your words.

To do this, click on the "# comments" link at the bottom of any post. At the bottom of the following page you can add a new comment.

Steve

Visitors, please read

Thankfully, it looks as if the pain has been managed since about 8 am, and we have anti-anxiety medications coming soon. We met Corrine's nurse, Shirley, who is very compasionate and clear... I feel we have a good basis of care-takers, and they are just a call away.

Corrine has had a very busy day, meeting with the social worker to discuss how to talk to young ones, business meetings, and meeting her new nurse and having a physical assesment.
All of this action has made her very tired.

Corrine is requesting that visitors be kept limited. So, if you are planning a visit, know that we are attempting to keep the place as quiet as possible for her. Please do not ring the bell, and meet with Don, Steve, or Angela before going to visit Corrine. We will let you know if she is sleeping, or if she would like you to step in for a short visit.

If you have talked with me previously about helping me with the things on the list, please plan on coming. I will be available.

Thank you, Angela

1st night at home

Well, we made is through our first night. Corrine woke up very frightened around 2am. She saw "a bright light, like fireworks going up in the sky." At her request, we called the hospice nurse and they responded immediately... the nurse drove right over. When she arrived Corrine had already calmed down a bit with Don and me at her side.

The hopice nurse decided not to do a complete assessment since movement causes pain and Corrine had found a comfortable position. The nurse did talk to the three of us and explained that Corrine was going through changes rapidly. The dreams, as well as the fear, are often part of that change. We were directed to talk to our regular nurse about anti-anxiety medication to keep her more comfortable.

As always, Corrine is showing her concern for others. She is concerned for her grand-children. So, we are going to talk with Hospice about how to best talk to younger children about her illness. Her grandchildren are 17, 5, 4, 3, and 2.

So, that's the plan for the day. I will try to keep this updated as possible... also, please keep your eyes open for "help needed" posts and call if you can help. We sure could use it.

Thanks,
-Angela

Help Needed

1. Computer Skills: I need someone with good computer skills who can help create a medical chart to meet with me (Angela) personally and create a chart we can use to keep track of her medication. Thanks, we have this covered

2. Shake deliverer: Corrine likes a specific type of shake from the shop just a few miles from the house. I was hoping to get one delivered. Thanks, we have this covered

3. Personal Shopper: We need a few things that can be found at a super-market: Contact lense solution for soft contact lenses, Cytaphil lotion (the runny kind, not the thick kind), 2% milk, instant oatmeal, ripe avacado, Arboro rice (rice used to make rissoto) and apple juice.
Thanks, we have this covered

4. Baby Monitors: We would like to borrow a set of high quality, easy to operate baby monitors to help us better serve Corrine. Thanks, We have this covered!


PLEASE CALL (after 8am) for details and to set up a time!!!

I will try to make note here as soon as the request is filled... it is important to call so we don't get repeats.

By the way, please ask for Angela if I do not answer the phone.

Thank you!

Settled at Home

We have made Corrine as comfortable as possible in her new 'bedroom.' She has had a very hard day with the stress of coming home, getting all of the equipment bought or rented and placed appropriately, and getting used to her new care-givers (currently Don and Angela with help from friends and family). It is a steep learning curve! Thank you to everyone who made it happen.

We did finalize our relationship with Hospice and have already needed to contact the on-call nurse to get help with her pain control. They were very kind. One of Corrine's regular nurses meets with us tommorrow to further assess her progress and make adjustments as necessary.

Corrine was not able to eat today, but is still able to drink and swallow her pain medicine. We will see what tomorrow brings.

To be completely honest about her situation, the doctors are estimating her time with us to be very short (one doctor said it was likely to be a few days to a few weeks). That makes it a quick adjustment for those who love her.

As of right now, visitors are welcome (she really likes the support), but please call before you come... Thank you for your understanding!

-Angela

"Be Still and Know that I am God!"

Going Home to Arvada

Corrine has made some important decisions. She has decided to sign up with the local Lutheran Hospice and they have been working today to make coming home a good transition. Don is currently shuffling furnature to make room for the new hospital bed which will be delivered shortly. And her medications have already arrived.

She is going to be residing in the family room. She'll have a beautiful view of the mountains and lake, as well as the fireplace that also acts as great temperature control (it's gas).

Since Corrine will be home and someone will always be with her, we'll try to be good about answering calls. If we are unable to answer, please leave a message. And, you can also leave a 'comment' on the blog and we will be sure to read it to her. Corrine has been enjoying the cards and letters she has been getting and is encouraged to know people are praying for her as well as her family and friends.

I'm going to go get Corrine now (Tuesday around 2:00 pm) and she'll have just enough time to get settled before the Hospice team arrives.

Plans to Go Home

Corrine is currently at the hospital, but is scheduled to be discharged tomorrow. She was given 2 units of blood today, and it seems that the new pain regimen is working well. The tumor is proving to be very aggressive and is the cause of Corrine's internal bleeding. The doctors can not locate the specific source of the bleeding, nor can they stop the bleeding in any way. They also cannot be sure of the rate that she will continue to bleed. Currently Corrine seems to be losing blood at a 'moderate' rate. To put that in perspective, yesterday Corrine lost almost a full unit of blood. By God's grace, it seems Corrine may not have to face a long, drawn-out battle with cancer.

We met with the local Lutheran Hospice today and it looks like they will be a good match. They are close to home and come with good recommendations. Corrine is still in the process of making the final decision with the support of friends and family.

I have altered my plans and will continue to stay in Colorado so I can be as supportive as possible. In addition, my brother, Steve is planning to fly in on Wednesday.

Everyone is lending their support, which we really appreciate. Look for updates soon if you are looking for a way of supporting Corrine and her family. We will be creating a calendar and hope to find a more organized way for people to volunteer.

Thank you for your continued thoughts and prayers!

-Angela

A note from the creators of 'Loving Corrine'

Hello, I'm Angela and I'm Corrine's number one fan, I'm Corrine's Daughter! I know how important it is that you know about how the people you care about are doing. Because Corrine is loved by so many people, we want to make that process as easy as possible. We thought that by creating a blog we would eliminate the e-mail chain and make it easy for you to follow her progress day by day. My husband, Rod, set up this blog today and I will try to make entries as often as possible. Some days, other people may post in my stead.

I usually reside in Tacoma, WA but I am hoping to be with Corrine as much as I can as we all go on this journey together. Thank you for coming along. Your prayers and encouragement are felt!

So, here is the update...

Corrine has been at Good Samaritan Hospital since Friday for pain management. She is in the process of working with the doctors and nurses to find a regimen that will enable her to manage the pain with oral medications that can be monitored at home. We'll be meeting with doctors and in-home care-givers tomorrow and if all goes as planned, she may be released.

Corrine is in the process of making important decisions about hospice care. There are several programs offered by Kaiser (her health insurance). We recognize the importance of this decision and pray the right hospice for her will surface.

For now, Corrine is celebrating Steve, Susanna, Camille and Anna's (son and family) decision to move to Arvada for a month. Due to Steve's ability to work from anywhere, and their desire to be close, they have sub-letted (rented) a place in Old Town, Arvada. Some shopping may be necessary to have the clothing appropriate for Colorado climate, since Chico, California doesn't get much snow. They are looking forward to spending time with friends and family in the Colorado area.

We'll keep you posted as soon as we know more.

-Angela

Purpose of this Blog

We created this blog as a way to help keep you—Corrine's family and friends—informed about her health and related challenges as they unfold. Things change so quickly, it's hard to let all of you know where things stand at any given time. We'll keep it updated as best we can.

Thank you for the prayers, help, and other support you've already given. Please keep them coming.